Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Dancing With the Stars

This morning on my way to work, I was listening to a Christian radio station and the question that callers were answering was if they’d allow their spouse to go on Dancing with the Stars, if invited to do so. The announcer was saying that he wouldn’t do it, nor would he want his wife to do it, but for the most part, the listeners (I didn’t hear the whole thing so the only callers I heard were female) who were calling in were disagreeing with him. The common theme? “I trust my husband and I know he’d never cheat on me so I think he should do it if he gets invited.” Are you kidding me?! This is not a matter of trust. It’s a matter of protecting your marriage. I trust my husband to never ever cheat on me but there’s still absolutely no way I’d allow him to go on that show (and I certainly wouldn’t either). Why would you purposefully put yourself or your spouse in a situation where there’s going to be temptation? Your spouse would be spending long hours with a very attractive person of the opposite sex, dancing extremely erotically, holding each other close, gazing into each others’ eyes, touching that person’s body in ways that would be absolutely forbidden in any other environment. Even if “nothing happens”, things are still happening in the normal course of what’s required of them in order to compete. And besides that, it’s hard to win a competition like that unless there’s “chemistry” between the two dancers and even though some people are able to perform really well, true chemistry comes from having feelings for that other person.

I was just stunned that women would allow their husbands to participate in that kind of thing. Is it any wonder why affairs are so common? If this is how these wives always think, they’re not doing a very good job protecting their marriage.


  1. I agree in principle, however, I have to say that in 34 years of marriage, in no situation, ever, have we said to each other, "I won't allow you to do that." My husband is not my child, I am not his mother. He doesn't need my permission to make decisions - he's a grown man, perfectly capable of doing that himself. This idea of giving your spouse permission, or denying them permission, much like you would a child is truly a foreign concept to me.

  2. I also agree in principle, and I also agree with coolschoolpsych. We (both genders) are in a temptation-laden world. The work environment, school, the Internet, and even church give rise to all kinds of opportunity for lust and desire to take hold. Do we forbid those interactions? Or do we work to make our commitment to our loved one as much like the commitment made by Jesus to us as we can?
    Some of the churches in our fellowship, mainly in the South, do not allow their members to partake in, as they say, "mixed bathing". What they mean is that they will not allow their members to go to a swimming event (public or private pool) where the opposite sex is there out of concern that the sight of people of the opposite sex in swim wear will result in unrestrained passion, premarital sex, and adultery.
    One subject they don't even broach is the problem of the homosexual in such situations. They rather pretend that problem doesn't exist.
    Of course, these same people watch movies and TV shows with more sexual content than ever occurred at a swimming pool, and think nothing of it.
    I guess I don't understand these "rules". "I don't allow him to go," and "We don't believe in mixed bathing," and so on would make much more sense if we were consistent. As far as I'm concerned, watching Seinfeld is just as bad as dancing with the stars.

  3. How can you say Seinfeld is just as bad? They only sleep with everybody they date, discuss sexual positions, talk about anatomy ad nauseum, and whole shows revolve around masturbation, orgasms, and whether or not someone has "real" breasts. Of course, this is only a TV show. It's not "real life". However, all the same, I don't allow my husband to watch it. It might give him ideas.